Living through an American Recession

Dealing with never ending life changes. Who says making lemonade is the best thing to do with those lemons life throws at you?

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Check yourself, uhhem...Check myself!

I was scrolling through comments people left on YouTube videos, yeah I know the perfect way to get caught up in drama, when I couldn't help repeating the same thing to myself. Why are people so negative and mean? So critical? And as always I stepped back and took a look at myself. Do I do that? We all do that. Not as far as actually posting it, but some silly thoughts like "What in the world is up with her hair" do pass our minds.

Someone once told me to be careful what you criticise, assume or judge about others. That issue that you unconsciously see in someone else is a direct reflextion about yourself. Your unconscious mind recognizes something in others that is in you. An attitude, a fear, a want. Lots of assumptions or judgements are based on your direct experience with something or perhaps hearing or reading someone elses experience. This took a while to grasp let along recognize while I was doing it, but I'm finding it to be very true.

A friend of mine is going through therapy with a psychiatrist and I am a little shocked by some of the advise she gives. As I listen week after week I've drawn a pretty good picture of the therapist herself, her beliefs, likes and dislikes. Much of her "counseling" is not very neutral. Her advise if very opinionated. Again based on her or someone elses experience.

A guy on YouTube made a comment to a young girl who was sailing alone, blogged and made videos of her jouney. He said how impressed he was until he read she was selling her boat, then he was unimpressed. She laughed and replied with a long "Who's trying to impress you?"

People may take the same action but the reason they are doing it, no one knows but the doer. "But she wrote about it, surely she must be trying to impress someone or she'd just do it and not tell the world."  It's kind of like watching a talk show. Is Oprah just doing shows because of her ego, perhaps she wants to be rich, for fame, to help people who may be going through the same thing, educational, sexual turn-on? Your answer is probably the one that is the reason you are watching her. Who knows, only Oprah knows truly why she does what she does. Very different reason that Jerry, Phil, Geraldo or Rachel Ray do their shows. Then you can ask the same thing about the guests. Why are they there?

For this reason I find it interesting to go back through things I've writen. Sometimes it's easy to see where my head was that day or to laugh and think "Did I actually think or feel that way? I certainly don't today."  I've seen authors make corrections and amendments to prior books clarifying or changing their ideas, opinions or comments about something. I love writing but my visions of the world around me change so quickly that I would be a walking contradiction because I'm constantly reading, studying and learning. So don't hate me for saying something stupid today, next week I'll probably laugh about it myself. That's the whole point of this blog, to show that the mind is always changing, learning, and thinking. (Or at least we hope so)

We can all "check ourselves" before prejudging others.

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